Homekid Tributes
FORREST RAY - Family Eulogy
By
Apr 11, 2008, 21:35

FAMILY EULOGY HONORING FORREST A. RAY…delivered by Son Robert

I’m Robert, or if you are among the thousands of family and friends who receive the annual Ray Christmas letter, I’m #2, with granddaughters 2A and 2B and great grandchildren 2A1 and 2A2.

We all know that we have had a treasure in Dad in his many roles.  He was all about personal connections and we would like to honor your connection with Dad. At gatherings of family and friends it is a tradition to hold hands and count off.  We won’t ask you to do that today, but we will ask you to stand and remain standing as we state your connection – wife, son, daughter, son-in-law, daughter-in-law, grandchild, great grandchild, aunt, sister, sister-in-law, brother-in-law, niece or nephew, cousin, neighbor, fellow Kiwanian, fellow Legionnaire, fellow musician, teacher, role model, friend.  Thank you all for coming. 

On behalf of our Mom, Virginia, we thank you for joining us today as we celebrate the life of the head of our family, Forrest Arthur Ray. 

Most of you know our Dad was raised in an orphanage and went into the Army Air Corps from High School.  Dad and Mom met in Colorado Springs when called to serve a church—he as music director and she as organist.  He was a single parent raising four children when he and Mom married. We still don’t know how he was able to talk her into it.  They soon had three more children. That was a time when there were few counseling services available to help couples experiencing what they were going through.  Troubles came and went, but eventually a strong family emerged. We stand here today as a testament to our mother and father.

They often said that God allowed them to accomplish the impossible for two reasons:  (1) because they were good friends and (2) they had a religious commitment to marriage.  That friendship, love and commitment continued for 42 years, multiplying each time a new family member was added.  Their home has CONTINUOUSLY immersed in good music, good food, and laughter.  Dad was forever at the center of any family gathering – playing with a grandchild, teasing a son or daughter, just talking, and always smiling like a proud shepherd over his flock. And when we would leave, Dad was always on the front porch waving until we were out of sight.

A simple but complex man, Dad was always slow to anger, ever quick with a compliment or encouragement, always supportive of each of our endeavors.  Dad was extremely proud of Mom’s accomplishments, along with those of each and every one of his children, grandchildren, and great-grandchildren.  He epitomized unconditional love; he never met a stranger; and we cannot remember his saying an unkind word about anyone.  He was always that person whose glass was never half empty but always on the full side, always looking for the good in everyone, not noting any fault.  His every cloud had a silver lining. 

Many verses in the Bible come to mind when talking about Dad.  First is 1 Peter 4:10:

Each of you has been blessed with one of God’s many wonderful gifts to be used in the service of others.  So use your gift well.

He truly didn’t care about becoming rich or famous.  He was a man excited by others’ successes -- and he was always ready to help others achieve their goals and dreams.  He understood that you could measure the worth of a man -- the value of the life he led -- by the lives of those he touched.

He had his sense of humor and wonder at life until the very end.  One of his last limited conversations was with brother Bill and sister Laura who had the family night shift with him at the hospital.  Dad was restless and trying to move.  Bill told him he had boots on (these were the therapy kind not western J) – well, they report Dad got an incredulous look on his face and said,  “I’m wearing … boots?”

In his last days we played comforting music for him and in his final hours the family sang hymns.  In his semi-conscious state, we observed him moving his arms as if conducting and knew that he was auditioning for a new gig in heaven -- and we feel sure he was greeted with the words from Matthew 25, verse 21:  

“Well done, thou good and faithful servant; thou hast been faithful over a few things, I will make thee ruler over many things:  enter into the joy of thy lord.” 

Never one for doom and gloom, he wanted his life to be celebrated, not lamented.  To that end, HE asked that his musician friends convene their Dixieland band to play at an up-beat gathering that follows this Mass.  We ask you to join us at the Shaw Air Force Base Carolina Skies Club to share your memories of our incredible dad, Forrest Arthur Ray.  And if you’re still in town later tonight--you are invited to join us at one of our family bonfires at the home place on Sans Souci.